Living with BPD

Living with BPD (Borderline personality disorder) like any other mental health disorder is challenging for the individual. The impact it has on someone’s quality life can debilitating to say the least.

The aim of this blog post is to raise awareness about BPD and how it affects someone’s life. There is a stigma around the condition which can be damaging for the person diagnosed.

What is BPD?

BPD stands for borderline personality disorder. Which is a mental health disorder characterised by a pattern of ongoing instability in moods, behaviour, self-image, and functioning. People with borderline personality disorder may experience intense episodes of anger, depression, and anxiety that can last from a few hours to days. They may also have difficulties with relationships, self-image, and impulsive behaviour.

What causes BPD?

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is thought to be caused by a combination of genetic, environmental, and social factors. Genetic predisposition, early childhood trauma, neglect, or abuse, as well as unstable family environments, are all believed to play a role in the development of BPD. Additionally, abnormalities in brain structure and function, as well as neurotransmitter imbalances, are also considered potential contributing factors. Understanding and addressing these multifaceted causes can help in the management and treatment of BPD.

How BPD affects me personally

I got diagnosed with borderline personality disorder when I was 23, also knows originally as EUPD (emotionally unstable personality disorder) It came as a shock as growing up I didn’t have any form of abuse, I had a good up bringing. I had events in my life which were stressful and traumatic.

For years on end I had no understanding of my diagnosis and emotional dis regulation affected my life on a daily basis which was incredibly difficult. It’s only since starting psychotherapy that I have began to learn about my condition and how it affects me. This is important in order to help manage symptoms.

Life with this condition is challenging at times, my emotions go from 0 to 100 very quickly and can be distressing for me and the people around me. It’s hard to maintain friendships and relationships due to our instability. I personally am very lucky to have a best friend who is incredibly understanding and has good knowledge of the condition as she’s been friends for 20 plus years.

I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t difficult for my loved ones and for that there is a huge element of guilt on my behalf. When I am in a meltdown I can be really nasty which I feel absolutely terrible for after. The issue is the emotions are so intense I feel completely lost and in crisis which is awful.

The stigma around people with BPD being manipulative is understandable but to some degree not everyone has that intention to be horrible. I know for a fact I can come across like this but in my heart it’s never the aim. I can’t control the emotions I am feeling inside.

Symptoms of borderline personality disorder

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is a complex mental health condition characterized by a pattern of varying moods, self-image issues, and impulsive behavior. Some of the common symptoms of BPD include:

1. Intense fear of abandonment
2. Unstable relationships
3. Uncertain self-image
4. Impulsive and risky behavior
5. Self-harming behavior
6. Severe mood swings
7. Chronic feelings of emptiness
8. Explosive anger
9. Feeling disconnected from reality

To conclude

Living with BPD is hard, for everyone involved but we do have some great characteristics also. We love with our whole heart, we are caring and we do value our loved ones.

I hope this post was helpful.

Sincerely Abbey x